18 May 2021

Starting a TapDat chat – tips for the perfect online chat opener

We cannot say it enough… ‘Hey’ is not an opener!

While starting a conversation with a stranger – especially one you fancy – can seem daunting, what you say when initiating contact doesn’t need to be stressful. With a few simple tips and tricks you can become a pro at the perfect introduction.

Read their bio

Check their bio for things you could talk about or ask them about. It shows that you’re paying attention, are genuinely interested, and starts the conversational flow. We all know what it feels like when you get the feeling that your latest match has just copy and pasted the same intro message to every profile they see… So avoid that completely with a little extra attention. Just a bit of effort to personalise and show interest can go a really long way.

Check their photos

Get visual. Check their photos for things you could talk about before sending that first message. Are they at the beach – ask what they were doing there? A particularly eye-catching outfit – ask about it. Notice they’re somewhere you’d love to go – get some recommendations. Show you’re paying attention and that you’re interested in them. It’s flattering and engaging. Just avoid compliments about their body or looks… it’s too soon!

Lead with a question

Questions are key to opening a real back and forth. There’s nothing worse than getting a message that there’s no clear response to. So create a reciprocal conversation with a question or two in your first message.

Tell them something about you

There’s a million reasons that whoever you’re about to message is going to think you’re great. So why not share one of them upfront. Sure, say hi, ask how their day is… but throw in something about you too. It could be a fun fact, a story, something you like, anything. Just keep it short and positive. Even better – use the ‘something about you comment’ to ask them a question too.


Got a tip you want to share with the community? Drop it to us by DM on Instagram and you might even see it added here.

Happy Tapdating